Goodbye 2017-The Hardest and Best Year of My LIfe

It's that time of year! As I begin to ponder putting together my annual year end blog, I can't help but feel as if I have been completely run over by 2017. SO much happened in the space of a short time.  No need for me to sit and dwell on it here in the opening paragraph, I'll get right to it!

January

We began the new year with a hike on the Illinois River Bluff Trail (IRBT). For Christmas we all received lots of new backpacking and camping gear and we were excited to try it all out. The temperatures were extremely mild for January 1 in Central Illinois and we had a great time on our "First Day Hike."

When the weather didn't cooperate, the littles would just camp inside.

This little boy was super excited to wear PJs that were very similar to Daddy's.

Emily rocked out her first semester at Union with this celebratory award.

Even more new gear was purchased. Our plans were to hike a section of the Smoky Mountains in July. My family was planning on vacationing there and we were going to go a week earlier to do some hiking on the AT. It had been a dream of mine to hike the Appalachian Trail and Curt had even bought me the 2016 AT Guide for Christmas so we could plan out which section to hike.

We did more hiking on the IRBT

Curt's mom had her second hip replaced

This. This right here would become a major life changer for us. I knew God was working on my heart to be open to moving and a new ministry, but I was having trouble accepting. That's the pattern we have often gone through. The Holy Spirit begins to work on our hearts. We feel whatever the call may be is crazy. We deny it. We then move into, "OK, I think this might be what it is." Then, God gives us an unmistakable notice that whatever we have been pondering is indeed HIM and we obey. At this point, I wasn't being obedient. I was comfortable where we were and the ministry God had called us to. January I pondered constantly, "Is Jesus Worth It?" but my question remained, "Worth WHAT?"

February

We did more hiking on the IRBT all throughout February. This verse was one that brought major conviction. I could sense God was calling us and I was scared. I was terrified of people's reactions. I was terrified about what it would mean for us in terms of a future. We had friends we didn't want to leave and a growing, thriving church. 

But not everything was about the call we were ignoring. We had Fairies to create homes for.

Our favorite YouTube vloggers FINALLY released their summit video and we gathered as a family to watch it.

Curt's grandma celebrated another trip around the sun!

We prepared for our May Boundary Waters Trip with the purchase of a Quiet Stove for our MSR Dragonfly

Did some fishing

And some more hiking

Then, the last Sunday of February came. We sat down and worked on our Bible study, "The Insanity of Obedience." 
Nothing was ever the same.

March

After discussing with the deacons options, they all three agreed that the best and easiest thing to prevent problems within the church would be for Curt to resign. He gave his resignation to the church on March 5 with March 26 being his last Sunday. He would stand at the pulpit 3 more Sundays. In the meantime, we had a lot to do. God had just called us to be missionaries. We floundered with what that looked like and what we were to do exactly. All we knew was that God had said Curt was to thru hike the Appalachian Trail. 

I had a personal struggle with this because it had been *my* dream to hike the trail. Curt didn't even like hiking. He did it to please me and we had places we wanted to go and hike, but thru hiking had never been on his radar. I battled jealousy and envy and therefore bitterness while preparing for this new chapter of our lives.

In the meantime, we did more camping. There's a kid inside there.

I was able to go and watch my sister's kids for a week while her nanny was on vacation.

Meanwhile, we had to get some last minute gear items so that I could hike with Curt at the beginning. At this point we weren't sure what to expect from the trail and how much of it he would be able to see. In the back of our minds we were worried he would need me to come and be a guide of sorts for him because his eyesight had gotten much worse over the past couple years. We didn't know what we would do with the kids or how to make it work, but we were open to whatever would need to be done. How blind we were... If God calls someone to something, He equips them to do it. 

The big day came! Curt said goodbye to the kids as quietly as he could that morning. His biggest fear was waking them up and having to see their tears. At this point we had no idea when he would see them again. We were scared and excited all at the same time.

We arrived at Amicalola Falls State Park on March 29

And on March 30 we began the trail. I was so emotional, seeing my first white blaze in person. As we hiked up to Springer (You have to go south on the AT to begin going North) I refused to look at a single tree. I wanted THIS blaze to be the first I saw. When I say I was battling feelings of jealousy and envy, I mean I was battling them. God had called my husband to do what I had dreamed of doing. <sigh>  The struggle was real.

This was our first campsite. It was the new Hawk Mountain Campsites and we arrived nice and early in order to sit and do nothing 😊

We finished March off at the coolest campsite ever. We had this huge area all to ourselves just past Gooch Mountain Shelter. It was our first unofficial camp spot along with the first time we have ever dry camped. I want to go back and take the kids. They will LOVE it!

April

We reached Blood Mountain. Now this was a big deal. We had talked about hiking Blood Mountain and to actually *be* there was amazing. When Curt was younger he had gone to Stone Mountain and he knew about Blood Mountain from that trip. Going here was something he had always wanted to do. Going there on a thru hike was never part of the plan, but here we were.

We met Jenny and Kelly the first night at Hawk Mountain Campground. We ran back into them several times and Curt had the captive audience he always dreamed about. They were eager to learn from him all sorts of things from how to hang a food bag to ways to lighten their packs. During a freezing rain storm, they went through every single item and prepared a box to send home. They are great girls and we were super thankful for their company. The plan was for Curt to hike a little bit longer with them after I left. It made me feel a whole lot better leaving Curt on the trail.

So this happened. Stupid vandals

AND this happened. Stupid poison ivy

But it was time for me to head home. I stopped by Jackson for some major meds for my face and to drive home with this kid for spring break.

We had a MASSIVE hail storm while she was home. Lots of damage to our cars that I never had fixed. Mainly because I didn't know quite what to do. Hail damage just adds character, right?

We spent our first Easter without Curt. This was super tough. His absence was felt at every family gathering, but especially at night. He was the one that always tucked them in at night and told them outlandish stories. He's always been a better dad than I am a mom and it was felt on a daily basis.

I got a new niece!!!

The kids made the most of every last play time they had with their friends. This was hard. Curt resigning meant the loss of our home, which meant moving, which meant, leaving friends behind. One day we had a minor fall that ended with a new haircut.

Thanks to the kindness and generosity of others, we were able to go surprise Curt when he was in Hot Springs, NC. It was a booster for all of us.

May

Isabel had her long awaited dance recital. It was the first anticipated event that she didn't throw up. Isabel has this thing that if she gets excited about something coming up, she gets sick. Every. Single. Time. It has happened before birthday parties, the first time she rode a horse, previous dance recitals, and her baptism. We have learned not to tell her when something fun is coming up because she automatically starts getting sick the day of it. Her nerves just cause that reaction.

Daddy's absence was big on her mind that day. I hate that his being gone is what helped to "heal" her of this reaction, but I'm thankful it doesn't exist any longer.

We began doing some practice hikes in preparation for meeting daddy at a special spot on the Appalachian Trail.

And finally, the day came that we went and hiked the Grayson Highlands with him. They were so excited to hike the AT AND to see the wild ponies.

We moved into our new place. It's not exactly every person's dream to move into their parent's basement, but I'm very thankful for it.

One of my very best friends gave birth a little (a lot) early to this miracle.

We prepared to head to the trail to spend a month with Curt. During this time we would not only live on the trail, but do school, and ministry to and for the other hikers. There was LOTS to prepare.

But first, we had another hip to replace. This time it was my momma.

June

Finally the day had arrived that we would leave. We were excited, but also nervous because we actually had no clue what we were doing. 

Our first day hiking the trail with the intention of camping on the trail. Had we known we would end up right by the truck we could have saved ourselves a lot of effort. lol

This became a view we would have often throughout the month of June. I treasure these moments.

The Blue Ridge Parkway gave us our first big views. It was super cool. The kids were able to learn about the history of the Parkway and how it was used militarily during the Civil War.

Getting to sleep in shelters along the way was a highlight for the littles. Daddy wasn't quite as thrilled, but he suffered through.

Some of the shelters had great streams for playing in. Mountain water is COLD!

Shenandoah National Park afforded more views and some GREAT educational opportunities.

We met people that we would never have known in our previous world. Sweets and Legion would be two hikers that we hiked with and met many times, with the first time being in the Grayson Highlands. Isabel spent lots of time with Sweets. Isabel would tell her about Jesus and Sweets would tell Isabel the stories behind each of her tattoos. 

We discovered the Junior Ranger program while at Shenandoah National Park. The kids learned about peregrine falcons, bears, snakes, ticks, Leave No Trace, wildlife in Shenandoah, and how to protect our forests for the future. 

The highlight of our educational trips was Washington DC. For $20 we were able to ride in on the train and sight see all the historical places they had only seen in movies and in books. We went to the Smithsonian (also free!!) and learned about history. It was an amazing trip and one that we will probably never get to repeat. 

We splurged halfway through our trip and stayed at a KOA in Harpers Ferry. This allowed us to tour the National Civil War Battlefields in the area and Harpers Ferry itself. 

We went and hiked to meet up with Curt as he was approaching the unofficial halfway point. We were all super excited to go to the ATC Headquarters for the official picture of the unofficial halfway point.

REI had a MASSIVE sale on kid's jackets and it had been VERY cold at night. The day we received the jackets in the mail was the first day of a heatwave that never ended. The kids wore the jackets anyway-lol

The highlight of our Harper's Ferry visit was the cannon demonstration. 

Staying out on the trail was always a blast. With the kids we made sure to always stay near a shelter, mainly for use of the water supply and privy. 

The time came for us to head home. We had reached the official halfway point with Curt. Ice Cream had been consumed in a ridiculous quantity and there were responsibilities at home that couldn't be put off. This was a tough, tough day. Watching him walk away never got easier.

July

This would be the first time we would actually cohabitate with my folks. Mom's hip replacement occurred very quickly after we moved in and then we left for the trail very quickly after she returned home. Figuring out how to make things work would take some time. After all, these two haven't had others in the house on a full time basis in years and they basically live like college kids; never cooking, eating cereal for supper constantly, going out to eat often, sleeping super late, etc. Bless their hearts. We completely flipped them upside down when we moved in. 

Caleb had a super hard time with Curt being gone, but thankfully Jerry stepped in and did what he could to help. Caleb stuck to him like glue.

To be honest, we all had a tough time. Curt's never been a hands-off dad or husband. There was a huge, Curt sized hole in our family, but I'll be honest... This helped take my mind off it 😉

We did more hiking. We just enjoy hiking. Here the kids are going through the tunnel in Route 6. It's part of the IRBT.

It was fair time! The kids enjoyed the Marshall Putnam Fair's science area.

Isabel climbed the rock wall to the top, multiple times. All she wanted was for Daddy to see that she could do it. We took multiple pictures for him.

Caleb was able to meet the jumpers. He was in awe the whole show. 

Gabe was able to go to Summer Worship University this year. He auditioned for the All State Youth Choir and made it. Next summer he will get to travel to Canada with them.

We finally had a birthday party for Isabel and Emily. Mostly for Isabel. 

The time had come for me to go get Curt off the trail for the wedding. Here we are having some lunch and a LOT of hydration at a deli that was 20 steps off the AT in New York. 

A YouTube viewer had asked Curt to come speak at his church on Staten Island. This was our first trip to New York. We had the privilege of staying on Staten Island at Stan's home and he took us around Manhattan. 

Back on the trail we celebrated anniversary #20. It wasn't quite the way I had dreamed we would celebrate 20 years, but it was pretty close to perfect.

We took off for Illinois and the wedding. I gave Curt a slight trim so he wasn't quite as bushy and wild. To be together as a family was priceless. 

August

We were loaded up in the Suburban and headed back out east. This would be the first time that Curt made the trek with all of us and somehow he survived. He was antsy to get back out on the trail.

Shelters near the road were a little harder to come by in Connecticut. At least ones that were on Curt's schedule and ones within 2 miles of a road so we opted to stay at a state park. This park only had a few campsites, all primitive, along the Housatonic River. This was PERFECT for the kids. They played in the river constantly and we weren't very far from the trail at 3 different pick up locations.

We used our canoe camping tents for this trip.

This would become one of our favorite places of the entire summer.

The time was drawing to a close that we would have to head home. School was starting soon for Emily and there was a lot of packing to do. We took our last hike as a family on the trail out to a super cool cabin. This was the last time the kids would hike on the AT with Curt. Well, except the older two. But we didn't know that at the time.

The time had come to say goodbye. Curt had met back up with his hiking buddy.

I spent several days in this hammock. Mainly crying. I missed my husband. This was the longest stretch of not seeing him that we had the entire trip. 

When we took Emily back to school, I finally got to attend the church that Emily had chosen as home. We came back to a house empty of 1/3 of our family members. August was tough emotionally.

September

Pity parties couldn't last long. I was hoping to get to finish the trail with Curt. I went on lots of hikes through our farm with these for company.

The big day finally arrived! We were loaded up in my mom's Tahoe and we took off!

But this was our view two days in a row. <sigh>

We made a slight detour to see April the giraffe and her baby.

And I finally got to see my man. He was super excited to grill something. Anything. I can't even remember what we ate, but it was delicious.

But this trip was sad as well. After 1500 miles of hiking with Curt, we said goodbye to Cur Dog. He is our Dairy Pup. (Caleb couldn't remember his name throughout the Blue Ridge Parkway and called him Dairy Pup) The trail was hard and dangerous. Cur Dog had taken a couple big spills. Finishing the trail was never on his list of wants and desires for hiking the trail so he signed off. I think it was harder for us to accept than it was for him. We missed him.

But I couldn't dwell on his leaving for very long. I had the toughest hiking I have ever done waiting ahead of me. 

We created a campsite on the side of Barren Ledges.

Curt talking to his folks at the top of some impossible mountain to climb in the Hundred Mile Wilderness.

While many won't realize it, or think it significant. We gave up a lot to be obedient to this calling. We gave up a secure job, we have no church to do life with, our children lost friends, we had trips planned and paid for. The hardest pill to swallow was the loss of our Boundary Waters trip. Every pond we came across, there was a longing. Being obedient costs. We don't regret being obedient, but we do struggle through, "what could have been." In the end, I'll choose obedience every time. One day, I'll bow before my God. It is to Him I answer.

But aren't these spots GORGEOUS?!?!?!

I've never hiked so hard to reach a sign in my life. The end of the Hundred Mile Wilderness was SO welcome!!!!

And finally. He summitted. Getting to do it with our two oldest kids was priceless. I won't lie. That day I was scared. This was a hard climb and a hard descent. It took us 11 1/2 hours to do it. But, we did it. How many people can say that?

October

I can't even tell you what being back together as a family meant to us. Having Daddy back was a big deal. He could finally focus on things besides mileage and food. OK, he still focused on food.

He quickly did all the things he dreamed about doing from trail. Popcorn & movies...

and BBQ

He got a trim, but we quickly realized how much we actually like the longer beard.

He went for trips in his canoe.

And pretty much returned to the man we all knew. Except, he isn't the same. And that's a pretty cool thing. To describe the change wouldn't do it justice. God is amazing.

Curt had several speaking engagements in Tennessee and thankfully one of them coincided with Sunday so we were able to visit Emily and her church. Emily has chosen to place her membership here and we are super proud of her. (Picture is of the membership laying hands on new members and praying over them. This is almost a weekly occurrence.)

And let's not forget about Halloween. After 6 months of not having Daddy around for holidays, it was sure nice to have him back.

November

As I went through pictures for the month of November, the theme became apparent quickly. Food. Everything was centered around food. Curt has nothing but time on his hands. We have no chores. We have no job. He is recovering from 6 months and 2,200 miles of walking. We have eaten well.

We did interrupt our food making and eating to go to the IBSA annual meeting. Where you can find us eating...

BUT it wasn't long before we hit the trail again. Of course, we brought food and our favorite; HOT CHOCOLATE! mmmmmmmmmmm

With time on our hands, we created a Texas themed dinner night. This was a blast. Emily was home for Thanksgiving so we went all out. Mom even wore a bandanna, Cowboy style.

Again, we have some time, Mom and Jerry were in Florida for Thanksgiving so we had Curt's family up. We had a great time making EVERYTHING from scratch. This was the first Thanksgiving meal I have ever prepared and it turned out great!

We discovered the Hennepin Canal Trail.

The kids put the Christmas lights up while Mom and Jerry were gone.

Curt and Gabe took an overnight canoe trip while there was still open water and the littles and I joined them the next day for some lunch.

Curt received his 2,000 Miler certificate from the ATC. Pretty cool accomplishment.  Just some last thoughts and facts about Curt's hike. God called him to hike the trail. That was it. Anything else that was said was our own input. We made mistakes in assuming anything more. We were so nervous about his eyesight. SO nervous. It is amazing how God provided Curt the eyesight he needed for the trail. It wasn't easy, but by the end of the trail Curt had this amazing 6th sense about rocks and roots. He was able to fly over them. I began to get hopeful that maybe God had begun to heal his eyesight. One trip to town reminded me quickly how poor his eyes really were. The fact was, his eyes were worse. God gave him what he needed for the trail, to accomplish the task God had put before him. Nothing more. I was so disappointed. A part of me had hoped, desperately, that God would use this as an opportunity to show off His ability to give the blind their sight. It wasn't to be. That's hard to take sometimes.

We met so many amazing people and had the opportunity to help TONS of hikers. We provided trail magic from North Carolina to Maine. We gave out food in abundance, water, Gatorade, and supplies. Much of the trail magic provided was given by the people of Temple Baptist Church in Canton, Charity Baptist Church in Carlinville, Dayton Avenue Baptist Church in Peoria, and family members. Not from the churches as a whole, but individuals that came to me and gave supplies or cash for supplies. We were able to set up tables in North Carolina and Virginia at trailheads to pass out all that had been purchased, made, or provided. Throughout Virginia we gave out gallons and gallons of water through dry areas, especially in Shenandoah. 

But where we were able to do the most help? Rides. We drove numerous hikers all over the place. From trailheads to town, from town to trailheads, and in a couple cases, from trailhead to trailhead. From Damascus, Virginia to Rangeley, Maine, we provided some of the best trail magic from the beat up seats of our Suburban and had some GREAT conversations. We learned about previous thru hikers that were out for section hikes and women working on completing their Triple Crown. We transported people that called places like Montana, Washington State, Connecticut, Florida, and Alabama home. Some names I can't remember, others we saw over and over throughout the trail. I'll never forget my nerves as I gave our first hikers a ride. I was terrified and it was a LONG transport.

Turns out they were not mass murderers and they were SUPER grateful for the lift. Later, that little act of kindness came full circle as they provided Curt some much needed food and drinks through a hot section of the trail.

We gave rides to Shammy, Huggie Bear, Frodo, 2 young men that had just had a run in with a bear, Turquoise, a couple hiking low miles just so they could enjoy the trail, Cowgirl, Sandals, Bluebird, Rocket, Tenacious, Noon Noodle, Spice Girl, Nighthawk, Tough Cookie, Lipstick, Hillz, Cur Dog, and numerous others. These were just a few that we could come up with off the top of our heads. 

But the trail magic wasn't just what we did for others, it was what some of our friends and family did for Curt. Because of you, he was able to take some much needed breaks from the trail. He was able to shower in hostels and hotels through the entire trail thanks to you. Many of you provided his favorite foods in his resupply boxes. And he was even given some pretty fancy meals at restaurants thanks to your generosity and belief in what he had been called to do. We were and still are humbled by your support.

The last word I will say about the trail, at least on this blog, is that we have a love affair with the trail. From the mountains and rivers to the ponds and views, we are in love. But more than that, we are in love with the community. I've never met a group of people that are so loving and accepting as the Appalachian Trail community. That community consists of hikers, viewers, trail angels, and those just in love with nature. That community is now comprised of many from Central Illinois that never knew thru hiking existed before. It is people from every walk of life, believers and non believers alike. The world is coming to the Appalachian Trail. It's an amazing life out there, not without hardship, but definitely one with opportunity. I highly encourage you to get involved, whether through hiking the trail or providing trail magic to hikers out there doing it, or just praying for those that are providing ministry to hikers. The number of churches that provide services to hikers is astounding. Some wash and massage feet, some provide food and transportation. It is amazing. 

December

Curt's dad needed an extra hand on a job so Curt was able to return to the pump truck. It was bittersweet. I cried tears of joy and heartache. Curt's vision loss rules our choices in life, but ultimately I know it is all God. It's a constant battle with my heart.

The kids got to see Santa!

We took a hike in December. In Central Illinois. Who would have thunk it??!!

Emily had a situation arise at school that she needed us for, so Curt and I took off for Tennessee to hang out with her. It's nice to be needed occasionally by the older kids. 😍

She still had classes and finals so we went hiking during our free time. It was good to be alone. Sharing a bedroom with the littles doesn't give us much time to ourselves.

Caleb had been looking forward to a hike and overnight with Daddy since summer, so they finally took off and had their camping trip at the back of my folks' property. That's a happy little boy right there.

We finished the year off with an early Christmas present from Grandma and Grandpa. All the younger grandkids took a ride on The Polar Express in Chicago. They had an absolute blast and no, we didn't feel ridiculous walking around Chicago in matching PJs all day. Ok, maybe a little. 

The older grandkids, minus Emily who was stuck with us, spent the day in Peoria at Round One (a new arcade type place in the mall). Everyone had a FABULOUS day and in my humble opinion, it was one of the best presents ever. 

I know the year isn't quite over and if anything else super exciting happens I will come back and update. 

2017... See ya later.

2018... Bring it. With gentleness, please.