Love
I've been unable to sleep well for a couple weeks. The feeling of knots in my stomach, the shaking inside that I feel, and the tears I have cried are almost a normal, natural feeling at this point. The "why" behind my sleepless nights shouldn't matter. I know many of us have had similar situations, I am not unique, but this dark path, that once started, feels hopeless, all encompassing, and heavy. It's easy to feel alone, unworthy, disliked, a complete failure, unwanted, despised, scorned, and dejected. And that's just the first 20 seconds. The couple of situations I find myself in have no way out for me. They are situations that others have built around me and I am not the one allowed to tear down the walls that have been built up. Basically, there is nothing I can do. At least aggressively; one on one with the parties involved. My faith is being tested. It wasn't until this very moment that I realized this truth. My. Faith. Is. Being. Test