Teresa's Ponderings

We hear preachers preach on it all the time. The countless sermon illustrations demonstrating the legacy someone has left behind are almost too numerous to count, but there is a reason these stories are told so often; we all need an example to follow. Recently, Curt and I have been going through our "stuff." Everyone has stuff, some of us more than others, but our stuff has gotten to the point that it has taken over our lives. The last two moves have made it impossible to have stuff and utilize the limited living space we have. In other words, goodbye stuff. We have no basement for storage, so everything has been piled into our garage. Boxes, tubs and shelving units, all full of items we thought we needed. It seemed to be an insurmountable task, but I was ready to take it on. In hindsight, I wasn't quite prepared emotionally for what was before me. When my dad died, we were faced with cleaning out his apartment in a short amount of time. It was a time of healing f...

The day: Memorial Day, 1995 The time: Mid Morning The weather: Sunny The place: The family farm It was a gorgeous morning. I had been dating this guy for about a year and a half and he wanted to go fishing and ride four wheelers on his day off. Who was I to decline an invitation of fun? He set up a tent in my uncle's yard, I slept at my folk's house and we made plans for an early morning rendezvous with the ponds.  It had been a very wet spring, (upon reflection, what spring isn't?) and there were some major issues with our normal trails. We'd been told which areas of the farm to avoid and off we went. Flying down the dirt lane, across the creek and into an alfalfa field.  I tend to be a touch competitive and so I gunned my four wheeler to get across the field ahead of my guy and had just gotten to the lane when I realized my four wheeler was caught in between some very large ruts left by the tractors. I couldn't steer my way out so I pressed o...

Recently we had the opportunity to attend church somewhere other than our own. This doesn't happen very often, but when it does Curt is as giddy as a school girl. He loves getting to visit places and see what all they are doing. He loves to hear different preachers, he loves to see the facilities, he loves meeting new people, and he loves just seeing how different types of services flow. Me? Shockingly, not so much, but I love Curt. Therefore whenever we find ourselves with a "free" Sunday, I begrudgingly take his extended hand and walk into the depths of the unknown. It has taken me years of preparation to be able to attend a church I do not know without fear, anxiety & self consciousness. Years. No exaggeration. So, this particular Sunday we drove towards the church of Curt's choice to attend their morning worship service. Curt had done his research and knew the size of the congregation, the style of music, and the time of their services. He was excited to v...

What a ride we have been on the last couple of days! This tale isn't long, but for us it has been full of ups and downs. I won't waste a bunch of your time with a long intro and besides, I can't think of a good transition anyway. The church we will soon be attending has a great parsonage next door. There's a parking lot and nice grassy play area that separates the two, but it is easily accessible for my hubby, which is a big deal when you are blind and rely on others to drive you around. The only problem? It is a cape cod; two bedrooms and one bath on the main floor and a big open room upstairs with no bathroom. No problem for most families. We, however, are just a little larger than the 2.2 kid average that is prevalent in America. Curt saw the one bathroom and I could see the tears form. OK, maybe not, but in my overactive imagination that's how I picture the scene going down. All this doesn't really matter, except to say, the church decided to build on to...

In 19 days, my whole life will change, yet again. In 19 days, everything that has become comfortable and normal will be wiped away, another page in the book of my life will turn and there at the top will appear the next chapter heading. This new chapter is currently being called "Canton" and I have no idea how this chapter will begin nor do I know how it will end. I do, however, know how I came to the end of this chapter and that is something many of you are wondering about. Allow me to take you on the journey with us and pardon any rambling or rabbit trails I may take along the way. This is a story I will tell from my perspective. I'd love to tell it from another point of view, but this is how I remember the sequence and if I put this disclaimer now I may avoid my husband, who has the memory of an elephant, from correcting me. Actually, probably not, because he has turned correcting me into a hobby, but whatever. Some months ago, Curt came in the door from his of...

Curt and I have an addiction to ice cream. It's pathetic, but we have to constantly keep each other in check on how much we consume. One of our more bittersweet trips to Springfield comes when we have to go to the hospital. Inevitably we are there because someone is severely sick or dying. Rarely are we there for a celebration like the birth of a child so our drive to Springfield on those days is rough. However, we try to find a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel by promising ourselves Cold Stone Creamery after a visit. It has become a tradition. On this particular night we had our two youngest children with us. We affectionately refer to them as the littles. I am not even sure how this got started, but it is an accurate term for this stage of life. They came to us much later than our two oldest children and they are tiny balls of energy. After Isabel and Curt had made their visit to the hospital (Caleb and I stayed in the car and played a game called Ingress because...

Today was not a good day. It was good for awhile, then not. Then good, then not. You get the picture. The events of today left me feeling defeated. It's an emotion I have had the displeasure of having with me often, especially recently. The "role" I now "play" often leads me to feelings of inadequacy, solitude, and sadness. I often feel overburdened, overworked, under appreciated and used. These emotions aren't limited to me, I know many other people could say the same, but it doesn't stop those feelings from being there. Today didn't help. It's Monday. And Mondays are the day most ministers quit...did you know that? I don't know if there is an official percentage but it's what I've always heard. I think it could be true. Who knows? Let's just pretend it is. I'm not sure why that's the day so many throw in the towel, but for us I know what makes it a day to dread. It's the day that we let our guard down against...